Chuck Norris...

[Ellipsis]

when alexander bell invented the telephone he had 3 missed calls from chuck norris...

chuck norris has a grizzly bear rug in his living room...the bear isnt dead, its just afraid to move...

chuck norris once pee'd in a semi truck gas tank...that truck is now known as optimus prime...

some magicians can walk on water...chuck norris can swim through land

chuck norris counted to infinity...twice...

chuck norris doesnt flush the toilet...he scares the shit out of it...

chuck norris once kicked a horse in the chin...its descendants are known as giraffes...

according to the theory of relativity...chuck norris can roundhouse kick you yesterday...

 

[Huckleberried]

 

[Zamazam]

Chuck Norris once cautioned a member not to go nuts with posting about Chuck Norris

 

[Ellipsis]

chuck norris' motorcycle has 4WD...

 

[TygerTyger]

Chuck Norris can divide by zero......

 

[TygerTyger]

 

[R3alJim Shady]

The story of the Ninja Turtles is true. Chuck Norris once ate four turtles. When he crapped them out they were six feet tall and knew karate.


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[Pancho_Brown]

Chuck Norris belives it's not butter.

 

[ghost62]

Chuck Norris vapes 100mg nicotine

 

[anendeloflorien]

Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas

 

[Whiskey]

 

[Whiskey]

 

[Whiskey]

 

[Pancho_Brown]

The boogie man checks under his bed for Chuck Norris every night.

 

[ghost62]

Chuck Norris knows how many licks it takes to get to the center of a TootsiePop.

Mt St Helens didn't actually erupt- it was Chuck Norris inventing vaping while on vacation...

Chuck Norris powers his mod with a Die Hard

 

[dankrips]

This thread has been approved...

 

[nightshard]

Chuck Norris once went to Burger King, he ordered a Big Mac and got it.

 

[Valkyrie]

chuck norris threw a grenade and killed 50 people...then it exploded.

 

[VapedCrusader]

Chuck Norris drips 100mg e-juice on a .001 build and doesn't even flinch.

Edit: Damn someone already beat me to this lol

 

[WARCHOP37]

Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting; he goes KILLING...because hunting implies failure.

 

[VaporJoe]

 

[WARCHOP37]

Chuck Norris doesn't sleep; he WAITS.

 

[Valkyrie]

ghosts sit around a campfire and tell chuck norris stories...

if you stare at the american flag long enough... a 3D image of chuck norris appears...

 

[UncleRJ]

Chuck Norris does not get cold's.

He catches them and breaks their scrawny necks.

 

[R3alJim Shady]

Three out of four doctors recommend Chuck Norris. The fourth died after a Chuck Norris round house kick to the face.


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[JLFROST]

Chuck Norris would get his Norris Chucked By Chackie Jan.

 

[WARCHOP37]

Chuck Norris can SEE flavors and TASTE colors.

 

[Valkyrie]

chuck norris poked me on facebook...my laptop exlploded

 

[Pancho_Brown]

Chuck Norris can sub ohm on Mark 10 cig-a-likes.

 

[Diesel Weasel]

Chuck Norris can SEE flavors and TASTE colors.

Technically this is a real thing. You just implied that Chuck Norris has Synesthesia.

 

[Whiskey]

 

[Pancho_Brown]

Technically this is a real thing. You just implied that Chuck Norris has Synesthesia.

It's either that, or he ate a bag of skittles.

 

[R3alJim Shady]

Chuck Norris was born May 6, 1945. The Nazis surrendered May 7, 1945.

Not a coincidence.


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[Valkyrie]

chuck norris uses 8' X 10' sheets of plywood as toilet paper...