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reddhott

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LestatBP

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One of my all-time favorite jokes.


A few days after Christmas, a mother was working in the kitchen listening to her young son playing with his new electric train in the living room. She heard the train stop and her son said, "All of you sons of bitches who want off, get the hell off now, cause this is the last stop! And all of you sons of bitches who are getting on, get your asses in the train, cause we're going down the tracks." The mother went nuts and told her son, "We don't use that kind of language in this house. Now I want you to go to your room and you are to stay there for TWO HOURS. When you come out, you may play with your train, but I want you to use nice language." Two hours later, the son comes out of the bedroom and resumes playing with his train. Soon the train stopped and the mother heard her son say, "All passengers who are disembarking from the train, please remember to take all of your belongings with you. We thank you for riding with us today and hope your trip was a pleasant one. We hope you will ride with us again soon." She hears the little boy continue, "For those of you just boarding, we ask you to stow all of your hand luggage under your seat. Remember, there is no smoking on the train. We hope you will have a pleasant and relaxing journey with us today." As the mother began to smile, the child added, "For those of you who are pissed off about the TWO HOUR delay, please see the bitch in the kitchen."

source: http://www.jokes4us.com/winnersjokes/allaboardjoke.html
 

Lady Sarah

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A young lady had lip injections to make her more attractive, before heading to the club. She met a guy and went to his place for some sex. The next week, they met again at the club. He asker her "why did you keep saying 'wahoo wahoo' when we were making love?", to which she replied " I was trying to tell you 'wrong hole wrong hole', you dense bastard!"
 

Lady Sarah

Platinum Contributor
Member For 5 Years
When I was just a little girl, I went to the park with some friends to play softball. I was up to bat, and actually hit the ball. Being as I knew nothing about the game, they told me "run, run", so I did. They told me what bases to run to. After crossing third base, they yelled " go home, go home", so I did.

They never asked me to play again.
 
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