Vaporesso Target PM80
THIS.....will go down in my history as one of the most stressful weeks I've ever had, the fact that I have even a solitary thread of sanity left in my ....admittedly sketchy at the best of times....mind, is nothing short of a fucking miracle.
They say that the two most stressful things you can do in life are buy a house, and get married, but....did you know that a third entry has been 'officially' added to that list?....No....me neither, until I bitched and moaned about it to a work colleague, who then let that little bum nugget of information out of the bag..
"Oh yeah....they say it's like...one of the most stressful things you can do now, next to buying a house and getting married.”
"WHAT?.....That's a 'thing' now?!? They added a third entry to the list and DIDN'T tell anyone!?!...Why wasn't it on the news?!!...Why has it gone completely under the radar?!!!....WHY AREN’T THERE RIOTING GROUPS OF MANIACS TRYING TO TAKE DOWN THE GOVERNMENT FOR HOLDING THIS INCREDIBLY VITAL PIECE OF INFORMATION FROM THE GENERAL PUBLIC!?!?!....WHY??....WHY CHRIS WHY?!?!"
I feel sorry for Chris, and so should you. He happened to get me the day after my first experience of this third entry....the day after I got a new phone.
Oh sure, they make it 'simple'...just send all your info from one phone to the other wirelessly....but does it log in to your 567 apps?....Does it force you to remember EVERY SINGLE password for every single log in??.....Does it answer your online banking ”memorable question” of 'What was the colour of the pair of underpants you wore the day that you shat yourself in home economics when you were 9'?.....NO.....no it does not. You know what it does do?....It sends you a password recovery email to your inbox, you know...the inbox you can't open BECAUSE YOU CAN'T FUCKING LOG IN. Sure...you can get right on your laptop and get the recovery email from there, but I couldn't because one of the kids had tripped over my laptop power lead 3 days before and shattered the power port (for the second time in as many weeks I might add), and the battery had long since died......SO... ‘Fine,’ I thought, ‘keep calm...not the end of the world....I'll sort it from my work computer when I get in’...
"Morning Pugs....we've got you a new work computer, it's all set up, you just need to log everything back in."
I'm not sure what happened next...hard to say...the last thing I remember is pulling this face..
Next minute...I'm standing in a pile of rubble surrounded by mutilated corpses (shrugs).....
Why am I telling you this?.....Well...you're not the Police, and....this was last Monday. On Tuesday I received a device for 'immediate review'....a shoe-in if you like, and upon opening said device, I only had one thing to say...
WHAT THE FUCK IS A POD MOD!?!
Admittedly....my mood at this point was still frayed beyond anything recognisable due to the previous day’s technologically tumultuous tantrum....but still....I'd only just got my head around reviewing pod systems...like...literally in the last review, but nooo....now pods are so last year, because.....we have pod mods now....
Why in the holy fuckballs did I decide to take that pensive step out of my comfort zone into a world that is as utterly confusing as it is ever-evolving?.....How is anyone supposed to keep up with this shit??.....Ridiculous....everything hates me....even me. Fuck me...and fuck this week......
Shall we?.....We best had really, there's no telling how long I have before this laptop turns into a fucking toaster or some shit...
................................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Welcome back my fine fluffy fog fetishists, back again with absolutely nothing the same, not for me anyway. Although in the space of time it's taken me to write this review it will probably be 'old hat' and already replaced by some bullshit device that I've never heard of, that does something I've never done before, and everything I say about it will more than likely be wrong, resulting in some snowflake reporting me for blowing his cat’s face off because I never mentioned that it's not safe for pets (?)....Man....I need to sort my mood out, I feel like I'm hosting a party and I literally know no one who's there....(breathe). Right, okay.....I am calm, I've had my rant, so here we are in the face of something new, something I have absolutely no experience with AT ALL, other than what I have witnessed this week, yet....something that felt completely familiar....confused?....You will be, as I present to you...courtesy of my so called 'friends' at Vaporesso ...the Vaporesso Target PM80 kit..
So...what is this 'Pod Mod' which the Target PM80 get's it's name from? Well....it's not a pod system, although it does have a pod, but it's not really a pod, it's actually a tank with interchangeable coils, but it's a proprietary tank because there's no 510 - this is the only tank you can use on the mod, so it's not really a sub-ohm tank either, although the coils are sub-ohm. And it's not just a mod...because the pod that comes with it is the only thing you can use on it. So It's an AIO then?....No....because the pod that's not a pod is detachable and you can..if you wish...carry a spare pod (included) with a different type of coil and liquid in it right in your pocket for a quick change when you need it. PLUS....unlike the majority of pod systems and AIOs, it is actually powered by a chip that gives you different modes as well as enough power to match most single battery mods.....so....it's a fucking ‘Pod Mod’ - a device that uses a pod, has the convenience of an AIO, and the power and versatility of a single battery mod....
Exactly.
The Lowdown
The Vaporesso PM80 is a complete kit. It has an internal 2000mAh battery, can contain 4ml of liquid in it's propitiatory not-a-pod-pod-sub-Ohm-not-a-tank, comes with 2 different coil variations, all kept in check by Vaporesso's versatile and proven Axon chip, which is capable of pushing up to 80w into its not-a-pod-not-a-tank coil, and out of it's not-a-drip-tip ....drip-tip.
Okay, I have to apologise at this point - new phone = new camera. I was a photographer for ten years and I do have in my possession a professional photography kit which cost me a small mortgage, but I have always used my phone for doing this, it's just easier, and usually...it gives good results. However, I haven't got my head around this one yet, so the pics might be a little....'floopy'....but after the week I've had I'm giving my brain much needed respite from all things more technologically advanced than a potato....(shrugs)....just bear with...the fact that my phone has survived this week is a fucking miracle in itself.
Now...first and foremost, what is difficult to comprehend in solo pictures is just how compact the PM80 is, so...
’Tis but a wee fella. Not as small as the pod system I reviewed last week, but way, way smaller than most single battery kits, and with it's resin looking (it's a vinyl sticker) grip and ergonomic shape it fits perfectly in the hand....and...in your pocket. So, if you're a guy you certainly won't be raising any eyebrows should someone notice the phallic shape in your jeans, although you may get the odd condescending ..."aww...poor lad" from female passers by as they swerve you and your non-penis completely...not based on a true story..(ahem).
Down the front we have all the usual function buttons exactly where they should be, the fire button up on the top and the function buttons down below, all of which are as perfect as I would expect from Vaporesso..
Navigation is simple enough, 3 fire to lock, 3 fire for lock off, 5 fire on and off, and both function buttons together to get into the menu. Here you will get options of VW, VV and something called Smart VW, which - from what I can gather - automatically picks a bang average wattage for you depending on which coil you have in. For example, I had it set at 60w, I turned on Smart VW and it went down to 55. Apparently the best parameters for the coil I was using were 45w to 60w. It thought it knew what was best for me.....it was wrong...not so smart after all, but...should you change coils and have your wattage way too high from the previous coil, it's a good thing to have, especially if you're new to this kinda thing.
