Become a Patron!

Non-Vaping Significant Others?

Does your SO vape?

  • Yes

    Votes: 5 14.7%
  • No, they smoke.

    Votes: 5 14.7%
  • No, but is accepting/indifferent.

    Votes: 18 52.9%
  • No, but doesn't like it/get it.

    Votes: 6 17.6%

  • Total voters
    34

robot zombie

Silver Contributor
Member For 4 Years
I've noticed that vapers often date either other vapers or smokers (ex-smokers in the making?) but what about the ones who do neither? I wanna know your stories. I know you people are out there! Hell, everyone is welcome to join in and share their vape relationship stories - including those who are dating other vapers, smokers, or ex-smoker/non-vapers.

I think it'll be interesting to see how vaping factors into people's relationships, given how near and dear it is to all of us and how important its role in all of our lives has been.


My girlfriend has never smoked and had limited exposure to vaping before we met. She knew it was this big cultural thing but the gear was all foreign to her. She believes it is a safe and healthy alternative to smoking and is very glad I have made the switch. She told me she would have struggled with me being a smoker, but also that it's awesome that I vape! She's proud of it.

So she is just infatuated by my vaping habit. She actually likes it when I ramble about vape stuff like I tend to here. Apparently, my passion for vaping is one of my strong suits. She is fascinated by coilporn and likes to watch me spin up my fused claptons and set up/maintain my rigs. She's just very, very curious and asks a ton of questions.

She thinks I look really cool and sexy when I vape - like irresistibly so. She says she used to watch me vape before we were together and just melt. Apparently I make cool poses and expressions when I vape. She goes crazy when I let it fall out of my nose. "It's not even fair!" she always says. It is a HUGE turn-on for her. Pay close attention guys! ;)

The plumes of vapor mesmerize her - she likes to play with them like a small child. There's just this look of childlike wonder in her eyes. Every time I pick up my vape she looks expectantly at me, like "Well, come on! Do it already!" She wants me to set her up with some no-nic just so she can play with the vapor when I'm not around, haha. You know how couples usually have scents they associate with one another? Well, to her, my scent (and taste ^^) is V3's Wubba Bubba. I left her with a mostly empty bottle of it to remind her of me. All I really have to do to get her to kiss me is have a vape. :D

Maybe I should start telling people my story when trying to get them to consider making the switch :p


But then, maybe I'm just lucky... ...I don't know. Maybe it's just because the attraction is already very strong, so things about me are automatically attractive. With most women my age (26,) I get the impression that it's like cars, sports, speakers, and what have you. And that's not to say that women can't be into those things too. That's just the vibe I get. No interest in it. It's a guy thing, not so much to me (I know better,) but to many of them. They tend to think that only men vape. I've asked many and their typical impression of a vaper is your greasy, arrogant, elitist cloud bro (which I just want to say, I personally do not believe exists as people imagine it to.) "You don't look like a vaper." is the general consensus. :/

Like, a few of my buddies vape. They all have girlfriends. Whenever we start talking vape, they're super-bored. Like, "Oh, great. They're getting weird about their vape thingies again." Also, that term is totally a thing. If I had a nickel for every time a girl called a mod a "vape thingy" with disdain...

I suppose that's really a separate discussion, though. We shall see. Maybe it's not as common as it seems.
 

Whiskey

Diamond Contributor
Member For 4 Years
My other half gave up smoking in 2010, I took up vaping 6 years ago and quit the smokes that same day. He has been very supportive of me, but does think I go over board with my gear stash. but he is 100% behind how much better we both feel not smoking anymore. He never tells me I should give vaping up.
 

fuseryder

Silver Contributor
Member For 4 Years
Member For 3 Years
My story is much more meh that normal but I smoked for 15 years and when I was dating my wife she would buy me new shirts to change into at her place so I wouldn't smell like an ashtray but eventually after our 2nd kid I promised I would quit and I did for like 5 mins, she actually brought home a my first cigalike and told me to try them, the rest is history. Granted she is not fond of certain smells but I have a man cave to vape in and she doesn't mind at all. I keep a menthol blend or some sort of wintergreen vape for when we are taking long trips in a vehicle so she doesn't smell it but yeah it's been cool to not have to wash my hands and take off my shirt every time I vape like I did when I smoked

Sent from my Pixel XL
 

Paratech

I forgot
VU Donator
Gold Contributor
Member For 4 Years
I've noticed that vapers often date either other vapers or smokers (ex-smokers in the making?) but what about the ones who do neither? I wanna know your stories. I know you people are out there! Hell, everyone is welcome to join in and share their vape relationship stories - including those who are dating other vapers, smokers, or ex-smoker/non-vapers.

I think it'll be interesting to see how vaping factors into people's relationships, given how near and dear it is to all of us and how important its role in all of our lives has been.


My girlfriend has never smoked and had limited exposure to vaping before we met. She knew it was this big cultural thing but the gear was all foreign to her. She believes it is a safe and healthy alternative to smoking and is very glad I have made the switch. She told me she would have struggled with me being a smoker, but also that it's awesome that I vape! She's proud of it.

So she is just infatuated by my vaping habit. She actually likes it when I ramble about vape stuff like I tend to here. Apparently, my passion for vaping is one of my strong suits. She is fascinated by coilporn and likes to watch me spin up my fused claptons and set up/maintain my rigs. She's just very, very curious and asks a ton of questions.

She thinks I look really cool and sexy when I vape - like irresistibly so. She says she used to watch me vape before we were together and just melt. Apparently I make cool poses and expressions when I vape. She goes crazy when I let it fall out of my nose. "It's not even fair!" she always says. It is a HUGE turn-on for her. Pay close attention guys! ;)

The plumes of vapor mesmerize her - she likes to play with them like a small child. There's just this look of childlike wonder in her eyes. Every time I pick up my vape she looks expectantly at me, like "Well, come on! Do it already!" She wants me to set her up with some no-nic just so she can play with the vapor when I'm not around, haha. You know how couples usually have scents they associate with one another? Well, to her, my scent (and taste ^^) is V3's Wubba Bubba. I left her with a mostly empty bottle of it to remind her of me. All I really have to do to get her to kiss me is have a vape. :D

Maybe I should start telling people my story when trying to get them to consider making the switch :p


But then, maybe I'm just lucky... ...I don't know. Maybe it's just because the attraction is already very strong, so things about me are automatically attractive. With most women my age (26,) I get the impression that it's like cars, sports, speakers, and what have you. And that's not to say that women can't be into those things too. That's just the vibe I get. No interest in it. It's a guy thing, not so much to me (I know better,) but to many of them. They tend to think that only men vape. I've asked many and their typical impression of a vaper is your greasy, arrogant, elitist cloud bro (which I just want to say, I personally do not believe exists as people imagine it to.) "You don't look like a vaper." is the general consensus. :/

Like, a few of my buddies vape. They all have girlfriends. Whenever we start talking vape, they're super-bored. Like, "Oh, great. They're getting weird about their vape thingies again." Also, that term is totally a thing. If I had a nickel for every time a girl called a mod a "vape thingy" with disdain...

I suppose that's really a separate discussion, though. We shall see. Maybe it's not as common as it seems.
First I want to mention that you write rather well.
You find a way to attract the reader and keep attention.
Hope you also do other writings in your spare time, I think you'd do well at it.
But to the topic, I very impatiently waited until I got to the part I was knowing I would read.
Her age.
By the way you wrote of her I just knew I'd be right.
(I was)
Your story is very interesting where most of the rest of us can't compete.
Especially with story telling.
I only tell long boring stories that people wish were over before they started. lol

My wife and I started smoking about the same age. (14ish)
I'm 5 years older than her.
Everyone that knows my wife just knew she'd never quit smoking.
Then again since she was born and raised in the town we used to live in, everyone knew she'd also never move from that town.
I started vaping in 2011 and convinced her to give it a shot after 2 years of trying.
(She's a bit stubborn)
Not only has she been completely off cancer sticks for a few years now, she also moved.
This was great for me because my place of employment was 4 hours from home.
Full separate bills on 2 houses plus being gone all week and driving back and forth only on weekends really isn't a quality of life.
So her decision to finally move was absolutely amazing for me.
She is the type that once she has something that works, she'll stick with it forever.
(maybe that is why she is still with me after 18 years)
However after many times of trying I finally got her off the ego pens and into something better.
She'd have never changed if I didn't just start buying things for her to try.
(if they didn't work out, I knew they'd look good in my collection so it was a win-win either way)
Although, now she is using a Cubis and Sigelei Fuchai 213 and refuses to try anything else.
I've bought many different mods for her and she has no interest.
I can't even get her to try to Cubis Pro.
(remember I said she's a bit stubborn)
So she vapes, I make her juice, and she is bored with vape conversation or hardware.
Even though she's asked that I slowly reduce her NIC because she wants a 5 year quit plan, I have a feeling it'll take a bit longer.
Even once at zero NIC I think she'll stick with it for a while longer.
We're all creatures of habit.

I have an entire room dedicated to my vape hardware collection.
This is also where my main socialization computer is.
The other computers have their own space.
I can sit in here, flood VU with my long boring stories, stare at my vape porn, and just relax.
When she comes in, she looks over the room with dual looks.
1. I see a bit of amazement.
2. With suggestive thoughts.
For #1 I can tell she is amazed by what she sees.
Not because she's into it, but the amount of hardware I have managed to collect in the time frame I collected it in.
She's been along for the entire ride so she knows when something new is on the shelf.
Even when she came home and I had built new shelves, she just glanced and kept walking down the hall.
For #2 I can tell she's thinking I have enough gear but she knows the odds of me feeling the same are less than zero percent.
She's a great woman and treats me well.
She knows that nothing gets purchased until all bills are paid.
She doesn't ever complain about it, but she'll joke if someone comes over and just happens to see the room.
While they always comment something along the lines of me having more than the local vape shops, my wife always manages to get a remark or two in about it.
The fact that she doesn't complain or even ask about how much $ is involved in this collection is awesome.
If she ever went through the receipts on the other hand, she may feel a bit different.
By no means are we wealthy, but we aren't hurting or hungry either.
If I didn't spend money on this, it'd be some other hobby.
I do wish that one day I'd have a hobby that made me money but that'll have to wait until I retire.
For anyone out there that has a collection, wants a collection, or is just really into something, I hope every one of you have a significant other that is at least half as great as my wife is.
Not only about the hobby but just in general.
Not that any of that is directly related to the question, but I felt the need to share it.
I'd say that was my $0.02 on the topic but it'd probably be closer to $18.45
 
Last edited:

inspects

Squonkamaniac
Senior Moderator
VU Donator
Diamond Contributor
Member For 5 Years
My girlfriend despised smoking, and I did too, but couldn't stop after trying everything including acupuncture.

After 40 years at a PAD+, I too stopped smoking the same day I began vaping. My girlfriend is very supportive of vaping, especially not smelling that horrid smell of stale cigarette smoke and even worse, stale cigarette butts, or nasty smelling cars and trucks. Vaping changed my life for good. I can only hope others can accomplish the same as we here have done, tossed the smokes forever.

Now I also despise the smell of smoke, and understand why others who didn't smoke did as well.
 

Artemis

Gold Contributor
Member For 5 Years
MY SO is very supportive. At first he was not impressed with the vape clouds in the house. I bought a air purifier and it eliminated his displeasure. I have been vaping 6 years. He doesn't smoke (he said he tried one cigarette back in the Air Force).

My son has a allergic response to certain flavorings/aromas. I do as well. I have to pick my flavors carefully if I vape in the house.

I don't sub-ohm or perform fancy tricks. More power to those who wish to do so.
 

The Cromwell

I am a BOT
VU Donator
Diamond Contributor
Member For 4 Years
My wife did not smoke so I smoked outside. I am just that way, she did not make me smoke outside.
She got me started on vaping by giving me a cgalike kit for Christmas 2 years ago. By January 1 I had dropped the cigs.
Now I can vape in the house :)
We all be happy about it.
 

AndriaD

Yes, I DO wear a mask! I'm vaccinated, too!
VU Donator
Diamond Contributor
ECF Refugee
Member For 5 Years
I smoked outdoors because I started doing that when our son was a kid, due to his bronchitis -- apparently being a 3.5pk a day secondhand-smoker indoors isn't good for a kid's lungs, who knew? :giggle: But after he grew up and left home, I decided to keep the smoking outdoors just because I had gotten used to furniture and clothes that didn't reek, and it was always in the back of my mind, "what if I quit one day, I wouldn't want that smell around me."

Then in the winter of '13/'14, it was the coldest winter in over 30 yrs, and I'd only been an outdoor smoker for about 16 yrs, so I was really friggin tired of freezing my ass off outside just to smoke -- so I started looking in to e-cigs; tried a couple of the drugstore disposables, they sucked, so I looked up e-cigarettes and google sent me to ECF... got an eRoll, which worked so well to keep me indoors and NOT jonesing for a smoke that I wondered just how many smokes I could replace with vaping; turned out to be all of 'em; nobody was more surprised than me, unless it was my husband. :D

He had played with Black n Milds a little in recent years, but when his doc said he appeared to have "possibly the beginning stages" of COPD, he laid them down and never had a problem; he had quit smoking cigarettes about 25 yrs before we even met, also without any problem... but he never gave me grief about my smoking, unless in our vehicle he got choked up from the smoke. But he bought them regularly, even when we were broke as dirt, knowing they were part of my "life-support system." So when I started playing with my eRoll, he smiled, but didn't get too excited, having seen me struggle and fail to quit many times before. Imagine his surprise when, after about a month of regular vaping, I managed to totally dispense with cigarettes.... and didn't go back to them. I did have a short relapse to dual-use after my appendectomy, but managed to get smoke-free again after about a month.

He's completely sold on vaping, if it can get me to quit not just once but TWICE, and enable me to STAY quit. He doesn't care what I've spent on vaping, because most of what I've bought, I still have -- it didn't magically turn money into ashes the way that smoking did. :) But, I'm kind of a tightwad, so even though I wanted to have a really excellent hardware foundation, I never went really nuts, and the most expensive mod I've bought was only $55. I'm also a "tootle puffer", so I never cloud up the house or vehicle; he has assured me that if I vaped the way he's seen others vape at various vape shops, he WOULD have a LARGE problem with it. Like me, he thinks it's ridiculous, since cigarettes never produced any clouds like that.

So, he's very supportive. If I ask him to go get my mod for me, he just asks, "which one?" since he doesn't really pay much attention to what I'm using at the moment, and doesn't know what most of them are called. :D He was amazed and delighted when I started building my own coils, because he had figured that he might get stuck with doing that for me, me being a "girly girl" type; he wasn't a bit surprised when I started DIY, because a) I'm a great cook, and b) I'm the biggest tightwad he's ever known. :D

He's also a very vocal advocate of vaping to others, when they spout pure horseshit about "the dangers of vaping." He can give them chapter and verse about it as well as I can, and he does! :D

Andria
 

robot zombie

Silver Contributor
Member For 4 Years
First I want to mention that you write rather well.
You find a way to attract the reader and keep attention.
Hope you also do other writings in your spare time, I think you'd do well at it.
But to the topic, I very impatiently waited until I got to the part I was knowing I would read.
Her age.
By the way you wrote of her I just knew I'd be right.
(I was)
Your story is very interesting where most of the rest of us can't compete.
Especially with story telling.
I only tell long boring stories that people wish were over before they started. lol
Thanks for saying so! Glad you enjoyed reading it.

I started writing half a lifetime ago and haven't stopped since. That post in particular has some problems with repeated phrasing and redundancies - I didn't put in more than a couple of minutes, so I'm glad it still hooked ya a bit.

Like you, I like to ramble. I enjoy the adventures and hope to transfer that enjoyment over to the reader in everything I write, no matter how trivial. I have a passion for what I'm saying and how I forge it that I hope rubs off a little bit and gets people a little more interested in exploring their own minds. I'm not a particularly interesting person, nor do I have many unique thoughts or anecdotes. But I can change that perspective if I bring it all together just right. I want people to look for that point of view within themselves.

Posting on forums makes for good exercise and a great outlet. When you write to and for only yourself, you don't consider an audience. It's very safe and easy. You hang yourself by your laurels and fail to see your own ass. Imagining one for yourself doesn't really cut it. That's just you pretending not to write to yourself as you please.

This more public and visible format makes things more conversational and intimate. Your writing becomes a dialogue. And you can "really get down to it," if you so desire. You engage with others and they engage with you - it's a shared endeavor.

I have come to favor going all in on that engagement factor. Choosing a relevant subject is important if you want anyone to care in the first place, but it doesn't matter how interesting the subject is if you can't entice the reader to engage with it on their own. It's about the journey that you take with your own two feet, maaaaan!

And it also doesn't matter what you write about so long as you can engage the reader! Just as concise wit is a virtue, there are merits to taking one or two simple subjects and stretching them out in any number of ways. Something has to stick. A conversation has an ebb and flow to it. Not everything said is important, and yet every little piece is what truly makes the conversation what it is: a one-of-a-kind, transient experience.

Ultimately, I want to be at a point where I can waste people's time as much as I want and have them thank me for it. A little escapism is healthy and provides a fresh perspective from time to time. It's fun to converse and waste the day away.

I'm actually writing a little book right now... ...seriously! It's a rattling and meandering journey through my cluttered braincase. I didn't really want to write it at first, but every time I joke to someone who has asked in earnest if I would ever write one that it would have to be about nothing, they take it seriously! I don't know if anyone will truly care to read a book that really only exists to showcase how I think and express myself, but I'm having a blast just hacking away.

But enough about things that haven't manifested themselves yet. Now you've got me rambling (is it bad that I'm derailing my own thread with my third post in it? This is why I never start threads...)


I can't lie. I'm very proud of our relationship - we both are. She's a definite keeper. We have the sort of give-and-take that doesn't feel like one. It's come naturally from the beginning. The vape thing is really the tip of the iceberg with this one. She's not really like any one of my immediate peers. There are so many things that make her so, so good to me. Things most people tend not to believe a person can have simultaneously. And yet here we are. Steady as she goes.

But it sounds like you have something quite enviable yourself, there. ;) I enjoyed your story quite a lot. Sounds rather familiar to me.
 
Last edited:

Nancy_Bout

Silver Contributor
Member For 4 Years
Member For 3 Years
LoL good one cause I fit in here!
I vape
My husband doesn't he quit cold turkey way before I did- we both were smokers for first many years !!
Now he thinks I'll quit vaping someday lol
But I love it and he's glad I'm not smoking and supports my vaping
PLUS I kept my promise to my father in law to quit smoking -
He died due to smoking complications ❣️


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

Synphul

Gold Contributor
Member For 4 Years
I'm not sure, not that I'm that old (late 30's) but people seem to have a different view on habits than they did when I was younger. I've dated roughly equal smokers and non smokers. When I was a smoker it was easier dating smokers though some non smokers didn't care.

Some people get anal about it, even one of the girls I dated who smoked. There was smoking in the house but only in a certain room or it was out in the garage or this or that. When it's part of your life it makes living in the house awkward. Granted it may be a habit but it's no different than telling a coffee drinker to go sit and sip their coffee by the window or take it outside. I don't tend to hold it against people, to each their own but I'm not about to be uncomfortable in my own place lol. Contrast that with a non smoker I lived with for 10yrs who never had an issue, didn't condemn me to a different room or outdoors or make me change clothes etc.

The last gal I dated I got a funny vibe from. I was dating her shortly after I switched from smoking to vaping and she was happy I made the switch, preferred it to smoking (so she said). I still felt weird vaping around her like I was smoking in the middle of a library. Maybe due to her constantly ranting about her ex who smoked and according to her filled the room with a huge layer of smoke that woke her out of a dead sleep choking/gagging. I wasn't comfortable around her and ended up going our separate ways.

Personally I don't care if people smoke around me or whether they vape or if they're non smokers. I don't seek out someone with a habit when it comes to dating, I guess it depends more on the person. I could be just as comfortable around a non smoker as I could a vaper or even a smoker but it's more about the person than their habits or lack of.
 

Johnnytraveler

Gold Contributor
Member For 3 Years
Member For 2 Years
On our second date I came to my gf house to pick her up. She asked me to vape outside so as not to stink up her house. I obliged. At the end of the date we kissed goodbye. She said it was a wonderful kiss. She said I tasted good. She commented afterwards it was a sweet kiss and she could taste the fruit flavor vape.
6 months later we are still together. Now she loves me vaping. She complains in the morning when we first kiss that her breath is ranked but mine is always wonderful as the first thing I do when I awaken is take a couple of vape hits.
She's introduced me to her smoking friends and asked me to teach them about vaping. She argues on my behalf (as I don't speak Vietnamese) when we are in a no smoking establishment explaining that I'm a vaper not a smoker.
Oh sure we argue about vaping sometimes as she hates the smell of my churro juice and doesn't understand why I just don't vape fruit juices as they smell the best to her.

Sent from somewhere in Vietnam.
 

TrackDay

VU Donator
Silver Contributor
Member For 3 Years
Member For 2 Years
Member For 1 Year
ECF Refugee
I got my old man into vaping after smoking for 40+ years. He uses an Eleaf 40w TC mod I bought him for his birthday. I tried to get my mum into vaping as well. I gave her a toot of my mod and she fired it for a few seconds before inhaling and coughed. Now she won't go near them and refuses to try them again. She is also a smoker of 30+ years.
 

gakudzu

Gold Contributor
Member For 3 Years
Member For 2 Years
My wife and I were both 25+ year smokers. We both switched to vaping last November. We had been smoking the same brand for the last year or so before we switched. You would think maybe we would have similar tastes in juice, as well. Nope, lol. Neither of us likes the taste of the other's juice. But at least we manage to tolerate the aroma.
 

netweight

Member For 3 Years
Member For 2 Years
Member For 1 Year
My woman refuses to switch from cigs to vape, has no interest. I smoked for about 23 years before switching and I'd say she's smoking about 22 years herself now. Twice after doctor visits/recommendations, she bought cigalikes and attempted but gave up as soon as the battery died. I've offered to buy her egos time and time again but she refuses and seems annoyed at my vaping and everything to do with it.
 

AndriaD

Yes, I DO wear a mask! I'm vaccinated, too!
VU Donator
Diamond Contributor
ECF Refugee
Member For 5 Years
My woman refuses to switch from cigs to vape, has no interest. I smoked for about 23 years before switching and I'd say she's smoking about 22 years herself now. Twice after doctor visits/recommendations, she bought cigalikes and attempted but gave up as soon as the battery died. I've offered to buy her egos time and time again but she refuses and seems annoyed at my vaping and everything to do with it.

Probably she feels coerced, pressured, both by the doctor and by your success with vaping; that's not the right way to get anyone to change anything. The only real way is to get her to think it was her own idea, but as long as she's buying cigalikes, "her own idea" isn't going to bear much fruit, if any. They're just not satisfying, even for those of us who were determined to vape, and determined that it had to be a cigarette form-factor. A closed mind changes nothing, sees nothing, will do nothing different, and it will throw everythinmg it's got at keeping that door firmly closed, allowing in nothing that's new and potentially challenging.

When I quit drinking, many people, even my own mother, saw that as a personal condemnation. I don't know why; just human weirdness I suppose. But the same is true of anything that one quits, while in the company of someone who hasn't. My mother also had to quit smoking the hard way, 10 yrs of patches, gum, and plain ol white knuckles, before it finally stuck -- so naturally, when I quit with so little effort, my mother felt offended, and jealous.

Your "woman" is annoyed at herself really, but is taking it out on you, as the symbol of her own failure to do something that, deep in her heart, she knows that she needs to do, but so far has been unable. It's easier to be angry with you than herself, because if she acknowledged her anger at herself, she might have to actually do something to change it -- which would mean no more cigarettes, and that's TERRIFYING.

Andria
 

netweight

Member For 3 Years
Member For 2 Years
Member For 1 Year
Probably she feels coerced, pressured, both by the doctor and by your success with vaping; that's not the right way to get anyone to change anything. The only real way is to get her to think it was her own idea, but as long as she's buying cigalikes, "her own idea" isn't going to bear much fruit, if any. They're just not satisfying, even for those of us who were determined to vape, and determined that it had to be a cigarette form-factor. A closed mind changes nothing, sees nothing, will do nothing different, and it will throw everythinmg it's got at keeping that door firmly closed, allowing in nothing that's new and potentially challenging.

When I quit drinking, many people, even my own mother, saw that as a personal condemnation. I don't know why; just human weirdness I suppose. But the same is true of anything that one quits, while in the company of someone who hasn't. My mother also had to quit smoking the hard way, 10 yrs of patches, gum, and plain ol white knuckles, before it finally stuck -- so naturally, when I quit with so little effort, my mother felt offended, and jealous.

Your "woman" is annoyed at herself really, but is taking it out on you, as the symbol of her own failure to do something that, deep in her heart, she knows that she needs to do, but so far has been unable. It's easier to be angry with you than herself, because if she acknowledged her anger at herself, she might have to actually do something to change it -- which would mean no more cigarettes, and that's TERRIFYING.

Andria
Thanks Andria, I think you're right on everything here. Not sure what to do, like you said, it has to be of her own accord.

Sidenote: I say my woman, not in a caveman way, lol, I just prefer to call her that and she calls me her man. It's just hard to categorize as we live together for many years, are basically married with kids but neither believes much in marriage or maybe we just are scared or maybe just don't want to get married. So man and woman has sufficed thus far, lol.
 

AndriaD

Yes, I DO wear a mask! I'm vaccinated, too!
VU Donator
Diamond Contributor
ECF Refugee
Member For 5 Years
Thanks Andria, I think you're right on everything here. Not sure what to do, like you said, it has to be of her own accord.

Sidenote: I say my woman, not in a caveman way, lol, I just prefer to call her that and she calls me her man. It's just hard to categorize as we live together for many years, are basically married with kids but neither believes much in marriage or maybe we just are scared or maybe just don't want to get married. So man and woman has sufficed thus far, lol.

Does she smoke in the house, or outdoors only? When I started vaping, I had ZERO intention of quitting smoking, and I also got very angry with anyone who suggested or even questioned me about it -- but I was really damn tired of freezing my ass off outdoors, and wanted something I could use, "smoke," indoors -- hence, e-cigarettes. If she's an outdoor-only smoker, it could possibly be presented that way: just a way of avoiding having to go outdoors. When I saw for myself what a great substitute it was for smoking, THAT was when the idea of maybe quitting occurred to me, and I did it very gradually, over about a month's time. And I still have the last pk I was smoking out of, in a ziplock in the freezer -- my way of keeping my options open, not feeling pressured or coerced -- because I'm definitely one of those contrarians that just as soon as someone tells me I can't do something, then that's the FIRST thing I want to do. Just having no cigarettes in the house is enough to bring on a panic attack, and then RAGE!

Andria
 

Bigjay1978

Member For 3 Years
Member For 2 Years
My wife hates it. She considers it the same as smoking. I quit the icky's about 7 years ago with the occasional smoke here and there. So she is always like "you quit for so long why would you start up again"? I try and tell her that vaping and smoking are not the same thing. I've shown her dozens of studies that show vaping is much less harmful than smoking but she doesn't care.. Very frustrating because I enjoy smoking, I always did. That's why I started vaping, because it satisfies that want to smoke without the nasty smell and other shit that's bad for you. Also I use zero nic juice 99% of the time.
 

AndriaD

Yes, I DO wear a mask! I'm vaccinated, too!
VU Donator
Diamond Contributor
ECF Refugee
Member For 5 Years
I would truly hate to be married to someone with a closed mind, who didn't care what I wanted.

Andria
 

dcarpentier

Bronze Contributor
Member For 3 Years
Member For 2 Years
Dear Dr. Andria,

(lol jk)
You might be on to something with the pushback from SO's who still smoke. My mrs is 20 some yrs into the habit and after nearly a year of me vaping, Ive only managed to get her to dabble with hers a little.. then its right back to smoking.
When I instant-quit (IQ) after 30yrs, that may have been annoying. I cant suggest smoking outside in the cold, as we use this isolated room (big air cleaner, open window with fan, house ventilation closed off).. so it's cold enough at times.. plus any time I mention the massive heat loss for the house she reminds me of how it was just fine for me to do up until I started vaping.. yep, she's got me there.
Health-wise, I took to vaping after a possible copd suggestion by a doctor (productive continuous cough). My coughing stopped right away, and a check xray about 6 months later turned out "clear".. whew, I dodged that bullet and no longer qualify for copd.
But, I wonder if she is viewing me as her guinea pig. Perhaps she can also smoke until she starts coughing lots then just switch to vaping.
I dont think it all works like that though... I think I just got very lucky.

I suggested maybe getting her some new hardware.. nope. Adjusting the nic/vg/pg/etc to something else ? nope.
(sigh)
 

AndriaD

Yes, I DO wear a mask! I'm vaccinated, too!
VU Donator
Diamond Contributor
ECF Refugee
Member For 5 Years
Dear Dr. Andria,

(lol jk)
You might be on to something with the pushback from SO's who still smoke. My mrs is 20 some yrs into the habit and after nearly a year of me vaping, Ive only managed to get her to dabble with hers a little.. then its right back to smoking.
When I instant-quit (IQ) after 30yrs, that may have been annoying. I cant suggest smoking outside in the cold, as we use this isolated room (big air cleaner, open window with fan, house ventilation closed off).. so it's cold enough at times.. plus any time I mention the massive heat loss for the house she reminds me of how it was just fine for me to do up until I started vaping.. yep, she's got me there.
Health-wise, I took to vaping after a possible copd suggestion by a doctor (productive continuous cough). My coughing stopped right away, and a check xray about 6 months later turned out "clear".. whew, I dodged that bullet and no longer qualify for copd.
But, I wonder if she is viewing me as her guinea pig. Perhaps she can also smoke until she starts coughing lots then just switch to vaping.
I dont think it all works like that though... I think I just got very lucky.

I suggested maybe getting her some new hardware.. nope. Adjusting the nic/vg/pg/etc to something else ? nope.
(sigh)

I agree, you did get lucky. It's fortunate for me that my own switch to vaping had nothing really to do with my health, because my asthma has actually gotten worse, since I switched to vaping. It was always very mild, and I suspect that the extra bronchodilators, and the topical anesthetics, in cigarette tobacco, kinda camouflaged a lot of my asthma symptoms. But I had 2 other reasons which had nothing at all to do with my health: I wanted to stop having to go out and freeze to death, and I wanted to save money, because cigarettes cost a freakin fortune and it drove me NUTS. So I didn't use the exacerbation of my asthma as an excuse to go back to smoking -- frankly I was THRILLED to finally be free of cigarettes, after trying so many times before, so unsuccessfully -- along comes vaping and BANG! smoking is out the door, within a month.

But none of that nonsense about "Dr"... I just know and recognize my own pathological psychology, the getting angry with those who want me to change -- frankly that's why my first marriage didn't last even a year: I can't abide control freaks, and be damned if I didn't marry one! :facepalm: I guess it's true that we seek out what we know: when I first got with my 2nd husband, I was constantly asking "are you SURE you love me?" because he wasn't trying to change or belittle me, though everyone else who'd previously said they loved me, constantly tried to change, belittle, and emotionally abuse me. Thank god I finally chose something better. :) Next July, we'll celebrate 30 yrs of wedded bliss. :)

Andria
 

VU Sponsors

Top