I wanted to post this as i would like to set the record straight and remind everyone who have only seen bits and pieces of this whole debacle what really happened and if you don't care all the better , best to move on. It's very unfortunate that some think they know what really happened when they clearly do not.
Didn't want to go without the truth being out there .
Before i decided to check out the AU, franciscan and i got along great , we never had any issue whatsoever . I have always been nothing but kind to him as well , i was always very supportive of him in every way , when he said he didn't think he was very funny i said yes he was and gave him examples as to why , when he said he thought he was ugly i commented repeatedly that he's full of shit and woman would kill to have him .
Everyone knows and has seen frans and my posts going way back , they were always tongue and cheek and we used to laugh and we made a hell of a lot of other people laugh as well .
Early, when i decided to see if the AU was for me i was doing my typical joking , well throughoutmy life i have often had trouble about knowing when to stop and when people may have had enough (even though i always mean well ) . I think an early joke that was meant to only draw a laugh was taken seriously when it wasn't meant to .
Fran has never that i can remember taken anything seriously by me because i think everyone knows not to . A few days later i read a post of his that was directed at me and i felt it was unnecessary and belittling to me .
I honestly have no idea who he is now , not anything remotely close to what i was used to , but it is what it is.
I responded somewhat harshly and said you know that was a joke , why do you act like i meant it , out of all the jokes i have ever posted that one had to be the most obvious , i even admitted half of it was words changed around .
A few days later he posts and says what i post has no value and doesn't add anything to the conversation ( well tell me something i don't know, thats a given, but did he have to say it out loud ) a PM telling me my posts are shit would of been perfectly acceptable and preferred actually .
After that i said to him that i would appreciate if he refrains from commenting about me because i find it overly critical . He then tells me not to acknowledge him . What great chemistry we have , ideal actually.
Thats when i said i'll just leave as it will be best for the forum and it was feeling like it was time for me to do that anyway .
i sincerely apologized to everybody for causing issues that i wasn't even aware of (very common with me actually) . I told franciscan that i was sorry that my style and type of posts aggravated him and that i wished him nothing but happiness in the future .
Everyone knows we have been head butting , when he's around i usually leave and i asked him to avoid commenting about me ( for people still scratching their heads saying what does all this mean , it means we aren't in love anymore ) When i decided to drop into the AU today to say hi , i wanted to make it clear that i think everyone on the AU is great ( except fishee)( love you fishman and will miss you, enjoyed are comedy skits together , your class through and through my friend) and i was not purposely avoiding anybody .
Well my entrance turned into a few more posts than what i was planning on and maybe i wasn't paying attention (common with me) but when i saw franciscan's post saying he's leaving i wasn't even aware he was there.
That was the first post i saw from him so i took it as( i should leave because we have been pretty hostile to each other lately) and all i was thinking was i should probably leave because i kept saying i was going to leave but i did not .
How the fuck that came across as i was Master of the Universe and stared at myself in the mirror all day is beyond me lol, but thats what i heard and i found that extremely funny .
Here are the facts , it was not me who stood in front of a huge mirror just last week and was taking pics of myself in different poses and then immediately posting them for all to see in the AU .
Nobody was asking for them and everyone knows what he already looks like , so i found that quite laughable .
As for me , nobody and i mean nobody criticizes themselves more than i do , it's not even debatable , at least 96-97% of my posts(over 2000) involve self criticism of ME and only ME . I am flawed in so many ways its not even possible to count that high .
Despite what some of you may believe by my off the wall style , inside i am all love and i can say with certainty that you will never come across anybody in your lifetime that is more sensitive ( embarrassingly sensitive actually , more than a typical woman and a wimp in the sensitivity dept compared to most guys but i can kick ass when necessary, so i'm good , i think ) ,compassionate, thoughtful and respectful than i am as a person although i never come off like that online .
I mean who in their right mind gets up and goes out in the early morning hours in freezing weather with a t shirt on and drives around looking for animals that are very likely to fuck my ass up and give me rabies ?
I actually cried during E.T , no guy does that , the flowers blooming when the E.T was dying and when his spaceship split without him , i was devastated . Had to hide in the theater before it cleared out to prevent real men from seeing me , what an embarrassment i am .
I'm guessing not too many .
I was planning on leaving when i said it the first time but decided to try again and it didn't work out for me , i am not blaming anybody here but it's best that i move on for good this time.
I have already contacted all the moderators i like and said i wish them the very best in health and happiness in their futures and i will miss them because they have showed me nothing but class .
I wish all of you the same , i really do , i can except negative comments because i know your going on what you heard or read or our just not understanding correctly , i hold no hard feeling for anybody (except fishee).
I still think all you people are fabulous i really do , this post may have a lot of mistakes but it is what it is .
I hope you all have a pretty decent weekend by the way, no fabulous , fantastic, or splendid bullshit though.