Yeah she will be tripping over them. lol!!!
I found this interesting article!!!
By Jaine Carter
Sept. 01, 2011
0
I was not aware of this problem, until a friend called it to my attention. Her son has psychologically abandoned her, refusing to talk with her on the phone, or allowing her to see her grandchildren with whom she had had a long term positive relationship.
The immediate question one might ask is, "What did she do wrong?" If you were not present when the son's withdrawal escalated, you will never know. Daughters-in-law will claim that mothers-in-law are to blame. Some are. However, in a growing number of families, daughters-in-law have begun a not-so-subtle campaign to distance their husbands and children from continuing interaction with their husband's family of origin.
Author Anne Kathryn Killinger decided to share her grief with others as well as shed some light on the subject. She contacted numerous grandparents who lamented of similar problems. Killinger shares these stories in her new book, "A Son is a Son Till He Gets a Wife: How Toxic Daughters-in-law Destroy Families."
"In a world where mothers-in-law are frequently made the butt of bad jokes, many people assume that they are the ones that make life unbearable for their daughters-in-law," Killinger said. "I contend that it is often the other way around. Many daughters-in-law today are selfish, possessive and narcissistic, and will not rest until they have divorced their husbands from the parents who raised them. It's a deceptively gradual process, and half the time, you don't even realize it has happened until it's too late. It starts with her taking all of the phone calls for the family, or the canceling of trips to visit family. Soon, phone calls go unreturned, and finally you realize that your son is no longer your son. He's just some other woman's husband."
The dynamics of a family can be torn apart by selfish choices made by adult children. This can cause a separation in the family that tears grandchildren from grandparents. The damage can take years to repair. Sometimes, the damage will never be corrected.
Local therapist Dianne Durante suggests that this trend is another result of the pampered Baby Boomer generation. Perhaps. There is a certain attitude of superiority projected by many, not all, of today's young people. They talk back to their parents and grandparents, act impatient, disdainful and critical. Some daughters-in-law "tolerate" their husband's family and this impatient tolerance is apparent. It is uncomfortable to be in the presence of someone you feel is only tolerating you. During visits, the parents often exert some kind of negative pressure on the situation, making the children feel strange about being friendly toward their grandparents. Grandparents put up with disdainful behavior because they want access to their grandchildren. Wives of male children have the supreme power to withhold this access.
Perhaps power and control are what these controlling daughters-in-law desire, but why do the sons allow this to take place? Grandparents provide a balance in grandchildren's lives that no one else can replicate. Studies have shown that multi-generational contact between children and their grandparents provide a special unconditional love and nurturing which is healthy for children.
Killinger and her husband John, a minister, believe that over time, withholding daughters-in-law have implemented a form of mind control techniques on their husbands and their children. "The same techniques that apply to the manipulation of a person in a group or cult, according to all the authorities on mind control, apply to individuals with ?battered person syndrome.'"
But the main hassle is that I really have to do the chicken first, because I can't be distracted with peeling/cutting up potatoes while there's hot grease going on, or I end up burning the damn chicken. So it's like, cut up chicken (I always cut it into "chicken fingers" so it cooks thru and thru in a short time), dredge chicken, fry chicken... then call the mate to come peel the spuds just after I get the chicken into the grease... once the chicken is taken up and covered with wax paper, I can cut up the spuds, boil and then mash them... IOW: HUGE FUCKING HASSLE!
