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Redheaded Stepchildren
- Thread starter penguiness
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A swift, quick kick in the groin. Near miss.
stoopid Hawkeyes.
You’re terrible.
That’s what she said.
Grannybears don’t scare me.
-21 wind chill here today with 2” of new snow on the ground.
know what that means?
no…not fuck Wisconsin…well, hold it. Yes it does. But what that really means is SOUP DAY.
Tomatillo grog on the stove. Flavors melding. I made a BIG pot. Everybody is invited.
Bring crackers.
know what that means?
no…not fuck Wisconsin…well, hold it. Yes it does. But what that really means is SOUP DAY.
Tomatillo grog on the stove. Flavors melding. I made a BIG pot. Everybody is invited.
Bring crackers.
I AM the royal she!
she scares the crap out of me!
Smart man.
Hawkie has brain freeze, so he’s being brave.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Have you been licking skunks again? Crazy talk
the puppy is ok,jusy throw him a nutdo
Better than kissing a koala.
koalas are fun, if you watch them eating the tree leaves then their eyes spin them bong they fall our of the tree they get as high as merbear.
did you not tell me merbear had that?
i see victoria has another 8k cases? why did they lift the borders, nsw has 20k!!
that is a myth
eucalypt does contain compounds that are psychotropic to them. But koalas also have really primitive digestion systems, so that part just passes through and poops out undigested
they take very little substance from food, hence eating so much
partly because we are at 93% double vaxed
partly because the people were at breaking point, or past it
partly from watching other countries set it loose, experience sharp spike then plateu and not such a never ending escalation that they expected
and a bunch of other factors
245 days limited to 5km from home and 2 hours exercise a day was shit
i blame huddy
ime double vaxed..but i also blame huddy,,,come on keith ..do you blame huddy?
Good night
David Boon, the former Australian test cricketer has the rona
He holds the world record for most beers ever consumed on a flight from Australia to England. It was around 50 beers
So, my take away is that beer is not an effective home remedy
Neither is obesity
Night
David Boon, the former Australian test cricketer has the rona
He holds the world record for most beers ever consumed on a flight from Australia to England. It was around 50 beers
So, my take away is that beer is not an effective home remedy
Neither is obesity
Night
nite puppy
yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh well done super man
hey puppy....shhhhhhhh dont spoil it you naughty pup!
Josh Giddey makes history as youngest NBA player to record triple-double
At 19 years and 84 days, Australian Josh Giddey overtakes LaMelo Ball to become the youngest player to record a triple-double in NBA history.
www.abc.net.au
you probably think that i have NFI what actually happened, don't you knuckles?
i'll tell you... aussie, aussie, aussie, oi, oi, oi. That's what
Not today. 1 unimportant bowl tomorrow that I won’t watch and championship game next Monday.
feetsball is basically over
i ha
i hate netball yukkkkkkkk
Josh Giddey makes history as youngest NBA player to record triple-double
At 19 years and 84 days, Australian Josh Giddey overtakes LaMelo Ball to become the youngest player to record a triple-double in NBA history.
you probably think that i have NFI what actually happened, don't you knuckles?
i'll tell you... aussie, aussie, aussie, oi, oi, oi. That's what
puppy..sometimes you are smart, but that was just plain stupidddddddddd
too highbrow?
your kidding ..right, i can live with anything, you should know that puppy.
why am i missing victoria nutdo?
i don't know
1 in 5 cooties pcr tests is positive
we are a very positive city
positivity is uplifting
so is a bra puppy
thats the answer!!!! i wear a bra and thongs yeahhhhhhhhhhh
Nope. Perfect.
hey !! you swore!!!!! i thick you should say sorry lol
I will preface by saying that I don’t know what constitutes trauma
I spend a lot of time going over old memories. I use the term “ruminating” but I don’t know if that is correct. And don’t think it is correct
Almost all of the memories are from 2008/09 and 2016. The earlier was a period of workplace bullying. The latter was a series of therapist and health appointments. I’ve never really explored them with doctors
The workplace bullying was in a female dominated workplace. I was the only male staff member, other than the handyman. I don’t think it centred around any single topic. Multiple recurring themes within the workplace
The health professional memories relate to my early experience of Hall Rd Medical Centre, and the doctors that Dr Tilly referred me to
The worst of these was Beenish Shahzad.
As discussed in a previous email, I now question how accurate my memory is. But, I will try to briefly describe it as best I can
She told me to sign a form, but would not let me read it
Beenish asked my goals
I said I was only there because Dr Tilly had harassed me for 12 months, and had no goals
She took a history
She got me to describe in as much detail as I could my childhood rape. It was a friend of the family, who had taken us to Lake Epilog. My mother and sisters were in a cabin. Doug and I in a small caravan. I remember being in a pitch black caravan, other than a small black and white TV
Doug was in bed
He told me to remove my pants, because it is more comfortable, and get in bed
I remember arguing, but being easily convinced, and a little entranced
He told me to lay on my side, and focus on the television
He told me to place a pillow under my hip “to get more comfortable”
I argued this, he said just get comfortable, relax, and focus on the television
I complied, being entranced and confused
I thought a poo was coming out, and I sprung to my feet. Saying I need the toilet
He said he couldn’t take me, because he had no pants on
Screaming ensued
Mum came in
I don’t know what happened after that
Beenish cried out “He raped you?!!!!!”
I said yes, in a matter of fact way
Beenish commented that I didn’t sound like I thought it was a big deal, when I should
I told her that the street where I grew up had 4 pedophiles. Everyone knew, but only murmured about it. And I think it was more common in the 1980s
Beenish had a shit fit
She took further childhood history. My mum coming out as lesbian, moving in with her lover and the lover’s son. Then that relationship breaking down and mum leaving along with my younger sister. I had no contact with mum for several years
Beenish kept prying, the burning of old photos. The lies about my birth family. The manipulation to make me work night shifts after school. But taking all my earning, and not even leaving me lunch money
Beenish didn’t take it well. At this point I was calm
She asked about sleep, and things went tits up. I explained that I don’t have sleep patterns. It is completely random, and different every day/night. And that trying to fix that with my first therapist, Paul, led to him deciding it was not worth the stress, and just do whatever. Which is also the conclusion Dr Lim (Psychiatrist) came to after exhaustive stress
She was very condescending. Saying that she can show me studies that sleep is the best thing for me. That all it takes is reading for 20 minutes and then turning the lights off. I reiterated that I had tried it before, exhaustively. It made me worse. She said “I can show you studies”, and when I replied “Please do” she nearly fell off her chair. And refused
I asked her what had changed about sleep in the last 15 years. She cited what new research there was on sleep. I asked how, if I had devoted years before to trying to sleep, would new research mean that the same approach would magically work years later
She ignored my question
I asked again, and again, and again
She said “you can’t treat me like that”
I said “And you can’t refuse to answer my questions”
We yelled back and forth
Again, she cried “You can’t speak to me like that”
I told her that I would treat her with the same respect that she had shown me. Which so far, by refusing questions and not allowing me to read the contract, was none. So I was going to treat her “Exactly like the obnoxious little whore that you are”
Lots of yelling ensued. She rolled her chair towards the door
My memory is foggy from there. But, I tried to leave quickly, she blocked the door and said she just wanted to talk. I pushed her against the door and told her to move
She repeated that she just wanted to talk
I pushed harder
She said that she was pregnant, the door handle was pushing into her womb
I told her that she would very soon be not pregnant, if she did not move
She folded to one side
I don’t know what happened on the way out. Beenish went to Paula’s office crying and shouting at Dr Tilly. Who kept saying “I didn’t know”
Mandy was angry, and said they have CCTV
I left ASAP. I never went back to Dr Tilly
I cannot trust health professionals
If I lay down and try to sleep, before being 100% unable to stand. This and the workplace bullying plays in my head. The lectures about sleep, the shouting and the unpleasant feelings play in my head
I'm also sure that someone commented on McCafe. I had tried to order a repeat prescription online. The system charged my debit card. Then I got told that I had to have a face to face appointment since I have broader issues. Which, whoever it was couldn't give specifics. He started by asking what brought me in today, and I curtly said that he called me in. It was an unpleasant appointment. It was late, maybe 6.30pm. And he said those appointments were for workers. Lectured me about lifestyle and things that I have heard umpteen times. Said that he sees me go into McDonald's. Wouldn't believe that I went to buy black, unsweetened coffee
Yet Allied Health obsess that laying in a dark, quiet room will fix everything. They do not relent, with the exception of Kaitlyn the dietitian, who says routine is different for everyone
I know that there is no way to make money out of forcing someone to sleep at night. So, the only logic is that it makes psychologists etc feel powerful, by controlling every aspect of my life. Timing and similarly between professionals suggests collaboration on control
I tried to raise this with Ganesh. I wrote prior to my first appointment. And made a spreadsheet of thoughts for a month leading up. He said that he is not going to sit down and discuss written material. He preferred talking. But, he does not talk much, beyond "Mmhmm" "Yes" "I understand" and doesn't provide prompts
I can't face psychologists. I can't raise this verbally
These ruminations take up lots of time. On a good week, maybe an hour per day. Then at other times, entire months are spent reliving these most of my waking hours
I spend a lot of time going over old memories. I use the term “ruminating” but I don’t know if that is correct. And don’t think it is correct
Almost all of the memories are from 2008/09 and 2016. The earlier was a period of workplace bullying. The latter was a series of therapist and health appointments. I’ve never really explored them with doctors
The workplace bullying was in a female dominated workplace. I was the only male staff member, other than the handyman. I don’t think it centred around any single topic. Multiple recurring themes within the workplace
The health professional memories relate to my early experience of Hall Rd Medical Centre, and the doctors that Dr Tilly referred me to
The worst of these was Beenish Shahzad.
As discussed in a previous email, I now question how accurate my memory is. But, I will try to briefly describe it as best I can
She told me to sign a form, but would not let me read it
Beenish asked my goals
I said I was only there because Dr Tilly had harassed me for 12 months, and had no goals
She took a history
She got me to describe in as much detail as I could my childhood rape. It was a friend of the family, who had taken us to Lake Epilog. My mother and sisters were in a cabin. Doug and I in a small caravan. I remember being in a pitch black caravan, other than a small black and white TV
Doug was in bed
He told me to remove my pants, because it is more comfortable, and get in bed
I remember arguing, but being easily convinced, and a little entranced
He told me to lay on my side, and focus on the television
He told me to place a pillow under my hip “to get more comfortable”
I argued this, he said just get comfortable, relax, and focus on the television
I complied, being entranced and confused
I thought a poo was coming out, and I sprung to my feet. Saying I need the toilet
He said he couldn’t take me, because he had no pants on
Screaming ensued
Mum came in
I don’t know what happened after that
Beenish cried out “He raped you?!!!!!”
I said yes, in a matter of fact way
Beenish commented that I didn’t sound like I thought it was a big deal, when I should
I told her that the street where I grew up had 4 pedophiles. Everyone knew, but only murmured about it. And I think it was more common in the 1980s
Beenish had a shit fit
She took further childhood history. My mum coming out as lesbian, moving in with her lover and the lover’s son. Then that relationship breaking down and mum leaving along with my younger sister. I had no contact with mum for several years
Beenish kept prying, the burning of old photos. The lies about my birth family. The manipulation to make me work night shifts after school. But taking all my earning, and not even leaving me lunch money
Beenish didn’t take it well. At this point I was calm
She asked about sleep, and things went tits up. I explained that I don’t have sleep patterns. It is completely random, and different every day/night. And that trying to fix that with my first therapist, Paul, led to him deciding it was not worth the stress, and just do whatever. Which is also the conclusion Dr Lim (Psychiatrist) came to after exhaustive stress
She was very condescending. Saying that she can show me studies that sleep is the best thing for me. That all it takes is reading for 20 minutes and then turning the lights off. I reiterated that I had tried it before, exhaustively. It made me worse. She said “I can show you studies”, and when I replied “Please do” she nearly fell off her chair. And refused
I asked her what had changed about sleep in the last 15 years. She cited what new research there was on sleep. I asked how, if I had devoted years before to trying to sleep, would new research mean that the same approach would magically work years later
She ignored my question
I asked again, and again, and again
She said “you can’t treat me like that”
I said “And you can’t refuse to answer my questions”
We yelled back and forth
Again, she cried “You can’t speak to me like that”
I told her that I would treat her with the same respect that she had shown me. Which so far, by refusing questions and not allowing me to read the contract, was none. So I was going to treat her “Exactly like the obnoxious little whore that you are”
Lots of yelling ensued. She rolled her chair towards the door
My memory is foggy from there. But, I tried to leave quickly, she blocked the door and said she just wanted to talk. I pushed her against the door and told her to move
She repeated that she just wanted to talk
I pushed harder
She said that she was pregnant, the door handle was pushing into her womb
I told her that she would very soon be not pregnant, if she did not move
She folded to one side
I don’t know what happened on the way out. Beenish went to Paula’s office crying and shouting at Dr Tilly. Who kept saying “I didn’t know”
Mandy was angry, and said they have CCTV
I left ASAP. I never went back to Dr Tilly
I cannot trust health professionals
If I lay down and try to sleep, before being 100% unable to stand. This and the workplace bullying plays in my head. The lectures about sleep, the shouting and the unpleasant feelings play in my head
I'm also sure that someone commented on McCafe. I had tried to order a repeat prescription online. The system charged my debit card. Then I got told that I had to have a face to face appointment since I have broader issues. Which, whoever it was couldn't give specifics. He started by asking what brought me in today, and I curtly said that he called me in. It was an unpleasant appointment. It was late, maybe 6.30pm. And he said those appointments were for workers. Lectured me about lifestyle and things that I have heard umpteen times. Said that he sees me go into McDonald's. Wouldn't believe that I went to buy black, unsweetened coffee
Yet Allied Health obsess that laying in a dark, quiet room will fix everything. They do not relent, with the exception of Kaitlyn the dietitian, who says routine is different for everyone
I know that there is no way to make money out of forcing someone to sleep at night. So, the only logic is that it makes psychologists etc feel powerful, by controlling every aspect of my life. Timing and similarly between professionals suggests collaboration on control
I tried to raise this with Ganesh. I wrote prior to my first appointment. And made a spreadsheet of thoughts for a month leading up. He said that he is not going to sit down and discuss written material. He preferred talking. But, he does not talk much, beyond "Mmhmm" "Yes" "I understand" and doesn't provide prompts
I can't face psychologists. I can't raise this verbally
These ruminations take up lots of time. On a good week, maybe an hour per day. Then at other times, entire months are spent reliving these most of my waking hours
Don’t think you can blame Huddy for that. That is horrible.
starting today I’m sending good, calming, serene thoughts you’re way with puppy snuggles comfort to wrap up in. Hang in there. You’re awesome. I look forward to interacting with you everyday.
keep strong puppy, you are brave to talk about it. i was in a group called northern knights, we exposed stinking pedos, i hate them.
Lol geordie
