Not sure I would go that far. Yes, I enjoy vaping & feel dependent on nicotine. If I went without food it could mean illness, death. Wouldn't be vaping then. I'm a true moderate, moderation even in moderation.
Think I agree with my wife. She told me last week, I need more of a masculine hand on me. Of course, she's right. Been a while since I've enjoyed a fellow. So yeah, my moderation might be just bit off.
Not that sex is the be all, end all. I do know and feel there's more to life than rolling in the hay. Also know and feel too, that sometimes that roll in the hay is just what one needs. Six or half a dozen. And not that any of this matters.
I'm just kind of at a point where I do not seem able to "have fun" in living. Don't get me wrong, I am a reasonably mature, responsible adult. We all though still recognize we each need something "fun" in life. Well, I don't have that be it sex, be it sky diving, be it spelunking, football, whatever, ... the "it" isn't there.
My fun as screwed up as it sounds? I like to work. Presently I'm back on the wait for a call/text to go work in a school. I sub in for calling off custodians. Often fear I do the work too well, and too much of it and it makes others look bad. So, I force myself to slack at the work just a bit. No one cares.
There's no advancing in the "job" and once you're hired in it seems only an act of some deity can get you fired. All it is, is a show up and do the minimum to do the work, job. Which I'm learning to not mind. I mean it's a lot better work than I used to do. Like my wife says it's my "retirement" work, "take it easy".
Yeah, yee-ha, I like working ergo I don't get "fun" in life it seems. No, my reward? More work. *chuckles*
While I've done sky diving, even done HALO, caving, played some football (soccer and American sissy rugby), I really don't get exhilarated over those things. I like them to a degree but they aren't really something "fun" to me.
Then, I guess a lot of my life has been "do because of need". When you live like that there's really not much in the way of joy. It all blends together as "the work" or "the fight" and days mean nothing, time just flows around you. You watch as others have "fun" but really don't get to know what you find fun.
Sorry I'm rambling. Need to go feed my cat in a minute.