Hi Jimi,
I spent many years thinking that my worth was tied up in the things I did - how many activities were on the calendar, how many things I got checked off a list, how clean my house was, how perfectly dressed my kids were, etc.
I wanted all the holidays and birthdays to be “Martha Stewart” memorable, so I went all out with tea parties, homemade pizza feeds, multiple course parties - and Christmases with too much food as well as individual gifts for each person’s plate.
Don’t get me wrong - it was fun and I did love the presentation and the outcome.
But after a few years I was so burned out, I didn’t even look forward to activities and things I’d previously enjoyed anymore.
And I realized that sometimes I forgot about PEOPLE in all my striving for perfection.
It was brought home to me one Christmas morning brunch when my daughter was about three and our son six - I was running around trying to get all the food plated up and to the other family around the table while it was still warm and my daughter was not having it.
It was too noisy, too much going on, but she was in her beautiful Christmas dress - and didn’t she know I was doing all this for her?
My husband, Brian, snapped the picture that still haunts me to this day of a sweet girl in a pretty dress crying her eyes out in front of the perfectly set holiday table because she just wanted ME.
Not the perfect food, the pretty table, the “holiday” - not even the little wrapped gift on her plate.
In subsequent years I dialed the holiday back a LOT - we still had a brunch, but it was
just a few super easy foods (the same each year as a “tradition” which eliminates any decisions!) and I got the kids involved in helping. I set the table with nice dishes, but no extras. I built in quiet down time with hot chocolate while lazily opening stocking stuffers.
And there were no more tears. Only memories of fun holidays and the foods and traditions we ALL enjoy.
Looking back, I see that as the start of my journey towards a simpler life.
I didn’t minimalize things as much as I
prioritized what I saw as important - God, people and time with them, and time doing things I enjoyed (and if the two could be done at once, bonus points!).
My life - and my family’s life - changed over the next years:
- We took the time to develop family traditions that we looked forward to.
- I started growing more organic vegetables, which made me think about what we had been eating and work towards change.
- I preserved the vegetables I grew and added more and more vegetables to our meals.
- I started making homemade food staples (including a soft 100% whole wheat sandwich bread!) that I had only thought you could buy at a store.
- Brian and I remodeled our first house, and then our second using DIY skills we never had before (not only did we save money doing it, we made money when we sold) - most of the time helped by family and friends that made great memories.
- After eating less and less processed foods, I was able to lose weight and do all the things I loved to do more easily.
- I developed ways to do most things easier in order to save time on doing what I loved.
We’ve come to appreciate living slower, making time for connecting with God, our world, the people in our lives, and enjoying the satisfaction that comes from a completed project.
These are the simple things.
The handmade things.
That create a simple homemade life.
What has your simple living journey looked like? How has it changed you?
Or if not yet, how would you like it to change you?
Here are 3 ways I can help: