Ordering from China (actually anywhere) Support Group...

[MrMeowgi]

I use my credit card to pay on FT but my card has an option to create a virtual card which I deleted as soon as payment is accepted

Someone else here mentioned that their bank does a virtual payment number that only lasts for the one transaction. Can't remember who that was though. Seems like a great idea if every cc company did that.
I do feel kinda lucky with my bank. They can print new bank cards on the spot so you don't have to wait 7-10 days.

Sent from a pile of wood chips

 

[SteveS45]

Same Status as it was.................................... But using China Post it is saying this now?

 

[Just Frank]

Here's a little piece of trivia you'll like.

That authentic brass og Goon 24 you got from me is likely the very last new one that will ever be sold from a major site. They don't make em anymore.

I bought that one from 3F and like an hour later sent Jinxed over there and they were out. Never to be restocked. Fasttech had been out for a while.

So, that may be the last one ever sold

Like I told you. The only reason I let it go was because I had already gotten a good used one by the time that one got here.

Thanks again for it. I've been putting off using it for all this time. I have plans to set it up soon. Maybe today. I do so love it already though. They're legendary.

 

[nadalama]

Same Status as it was.................................... But using China Post it is saying this now?

View attachment 171700

Truthfully, I think that changes as other activity occurs (or doesn't occur). If something sits for a few days, iirc you'll see that estimate change. Trying to predict the future these days is an exercise in futility, eh?

 

[SteveS45]

Well it arrived at my Local PO and got scanned. I wonder if it is because it is from China that they leave you wondering?

 

[nadalama]

Well it arrived at my Local PO and got scanned. I wonder if it is because it is from China that they leave you wondering?

View attachment 171708

You living in NY is probably either a blessing or a curse, depending on which coast a Chinese shipment lands on. For a while it seemed like all of mine came through NY or NJ, but these days it's a crap shoot. But if you're lucky enough to have a shipment come into the country through NY/NJ, you'd get quicker delivery than almost all the rest of us, I would think. Unless of course, as you said, something gets misdirected in a sorting center.

 

[SteveS45]

I have never had a shipment not come in at JFK but I have had them go to Cincy before coming back to New York~!

 

[gsmit1]

Isn't this fun Steve?

 

[gsmit1]

I have never had a shipment not come in at JFK but I have had them go to Cincy before coming back to New York~!

I've had em come in from LAX and Kennedy like @nadalama

Just to let you know, this is a multinational syndrome. I ordered some Billet Box parts awhile back from an outfit in Calgary Alberta, a straight shot eastbound of a thousand miles from there to Detroit. Should travel across Canada and enter the US at Chicago right?

Wrong. Went from Calgary, west (the opposite direction) to Vancouver to LAX and worked it's way back up from there. True story.

 

[gsmit1]

I'm convinced that all parcel delivery workers worldwide are required to fail a basic navigation and geography test before being considered for employment.

 

[nadalama]

I'm convinced that all parcel delivery workers worldwide are required to fail a basic navigation and geography test before being considered for employment.

Aw, c'mon now. You know renegade programmers are to blame. You know the ones who write that routing software? I think THEY are the ones that fail the basic navigation and geography tests!

I'm a programmer/analyst in a retail shop. Half the time when I want it, I cannot get Mio Lemonade from Walmart, and I'm not talking about just during Covid times. I don't know it for certain, but I would guess that Walmart has well over a thousand people in their IT-related departments, yet their auto-replenishment of basic goods absolutely stinks. Their own brand of instant butter-flavor grits? Out of stock for THREE WEEKS. English muffins? OOS Bagels? OOS HERSHEY'S SYRUP? OOS What the actual fuck?

One of the things an auto-replenishment system should do is track the sales of items, and if those items sell out week after week, or day after day, the demand should be increased. It is obvious to anyone who knows their ass from a hole in the ground that the company is losing sales.

When I run across stuff like this, which is the same kind of issue as the fucked up routing that USPS has suddenly become expert at, I just want to find the responsible person(s) and beat them with a brick. The most basic thing they should be able to do, THEY SUCK AT DOING IT.

Maybe all these 21-year-old programmers, just out of college, should be made to work in the jobs for which they are writing code, or work in customer service where they hear all the complaints, then they'd know a little something about what they're doing. Right now I think it would serve the USPS programmers right if they had to hear about every single stupid routing problem that happens, all over the country. Imagine the fun!

 

[SteveS45]

Just to let you know, this is a multinational syndrome. I ordered some Billet Box parts awhile back from an outfit in Calgary Alberta, a straight shot eastbound of a thousand miles from there to Detroit. Should travel across Canada and enter the US at Chicago right?

Oh when stuff comes from Canada you would think it comes straight South. I have had it go to Seattle before coming across the USA to NY. It literally was on the East Coast in Canada 1st.

 

[Just Frank]

Update-
Vapesourcing said they'd switch my order to a red kit instead of the blue one I ordered. It should ship out in a day or two.

@nadalama thank you for offering to keep an eye out for me. The price to beat is $40 for the mod only at Element. I'll hunt around for a day or two to see if there's any blue ones cheaper somewhere. As far as I know it's just called - "Smok Mag Grip" with no numbers or anything. I'll order from Element if I have to because I'm invested now lol. It will be mine..... muwahahahaha!

 

[SteveS45]

Well I got my order after lunch~!

 

[Just Frank]

Aw, c'mon now. You know renegade programmers are to blame. You know the ones who write that routing software? I think THEY are the ones that fail the basic navigation and geography tests!

I'm a programmer/analyst in a retail shop. Half the time when I want it, I cannot get Mio Lemonade from Walmart, and I'm not talking about just during Covid times. I don't know it for certain, but I would guess that Walmart has well over a thousand people in their IT-related departments, yet their auto-replenishment of basic goods absolutely stinks. Their own brand of instant butter-flavor grits? Out of stock for THREE WEEKS. English muffins? OOS Bagels? OOS HERSHEY'S SYRUP? OOS What the actual fuck?

One of the things an auto-replenishment system should do is track the sales of items, and if those items sell out week after week, or day after day, the demand should be increased. It is obvious to anyone who knows their ass from a hole in the ground that the company is losing sales.

When I run across stuff like this, which is the same kind of issue as the fucked up routing that USPS has suddenly become expert at, I just want to find the responsible person(s) and beat them with a brick. The most basic thing they should be able to do, THEY SUCK AT DOING IT.

Maybe all these 21-year-old programmers, just out of college, should be made to work in the jobs for which they are writing code, or work in customer service where they hear all the complaints, then they'd know a little something about what they're doing. Right now I think it would serve the USPS programmers right if they had to hear about every single stupid routing problem that happens, all over the country. Imagine the fun!

Yeah Wal-Mart is inconsistent. I asked a manager looking person "Who do I need to talk to about getting my favorite cereal back here?" They have it only occasion which is ridiculous. Either keep stocking it or don't. Same thing for my hons coffee. It shows up then it's gone for a couple of months then it's back.

Anyways, the guy told me they had it in the Wal-Mart down the road 30 miles away, after playing with his phone. I told him that's not what I asked. "Who orders the cereal? Do you order the cereal?" He said no. They stock "whatever distribution sends them". Somebody's gotta be in charge of cereal lol. In case anyone wants to know, it's Strawberry Frosted Mini Wheats.

 

[SteveS45]

Yeah Wal-Mart is inconsistent. I asked a manager looking person "Who do I need to talk to about getting my favorite cereal back here?" They have it only occasion which is ridiculous. Either keep stocking it or don't. Same thing for my hons coffee. It shows up then it's gone for a couple of months then it's back.

Anyways, the guy told me they had it in the Wal-Mart down the road 30 miles away, after playing with his phone. I told him that's not what I asked. "Who orders the cereal? Do you order the cereal?" He said no. They stock "whatever distribution sends them". Somebody's gotta be in charge of cereal lol. In case anyone wants to know, it's Strawberry Frosted Mini Wheats.

With the Pandemic, Supply Chains are affected because I couldn't find Paper Dinner Plates for over a month and have not seen Bounty Napkins for 6 months.

 

[MrMeowgi]

Aw, c'mon now. You know renegade programmers are to blame. You know the ones who write that routing software? I think THEY are the ones that fail the basic navigation and geography tests!

I'm a programmer/analyst in a retail shop. Half the time when I want it, I cannot get Mio Lemonade from Walmart, and I'm not talking about just during Covid times. I don't know it for certain, but I would guess that Walmart has well over a thousand people in their IT-related departments, yet their auto-replenishment of basic goods absolutely stinks. Their own brand of instant butter-flavor grits? Out of stock for THREE WEEKS. English muffins? OOS Bagels? OOS HERSHEY'S SYRUP? OOS What the actual fuck?

One of the things an auto-replenishment system should do is track the sales of items, and if those items sell out week after week, or day after day, the demand should be increased. It is obvious to anyone who knows their ass from a hole in the ground that the company is losing sales.

When I run across stuff like this, which is the same kind of issue as the fucked up routing that USPS has suddenly become expert at, I just want to find the responsible person(s) and beat them with a brick. The most basic thing they should be able to do, THEY SUCK AT DOING IT.

Maybe all these 21-year-old programmers, just out of college, should be made to work in the jobs for which they are writing code, or work in customer service where they hear all the complaints, then they'd know a little something about what they're doing. Right now I think it would serve the USPS programmers right if they had to hear about every single stupid routing problem that happens, all over the country. Imagine the fun!

I just want to say I love when you cuss. Just shows raw emotion and I love it. Thanks for the giggle.

Sent from a pile of wood chips

 

[nadalama]

I just want to say I love when you cuss. Just shows raw emotion and I love it. Thanks for the giggle.

Sent from a pile of wood chips

The urge is there to get a little redneck from time to time. I just cain't help myself! lol

 

[gsmit1]

Thanks again for it. I've been putting off using it for all this time. I have plans to set it up soon. Maybe today. I do so love it already though. They're legendary.

I'm about ready to start a "Let's cheer JustFrank on in Getting that First Hybrid Mech Tube Going" thread

That brass Goon with a pair of your aliens @ about .15 out close to the airflow holes on your Dreamer is gonna be the thang.

 

[nadalama]

I'm about ready to start a "Let's cheer JustFrank on in Getting that First Hybrid Mech Tube Going" thread

That brass Goon with a pair of your aliens @ about .15 out close to the airflow holes on your Dreamer is gonna be the thang.
View attachment 171729

Has she not got that Dreamer going yet? @JustFrank, what are we gonna do with you?

What it is, is she discovered building aliens, and she's just obsessed and loving it. She's making some beautiful ones, too.

Meanwhile, I cannot find my brass C2MNT or my damn Timekeeper. I think my recliner eats vape gear.

What does one use to polish brass mech tubes? My Brizo already has a light film of some kind of funk on it. Not funky funk, just plain funk.

 

[SteveS45]

 

[Ms. Trixy]

Well I'll be dipped in shit. I finally got a parcel from my 9/6 order with Sourcemore and it had all of the items in it. I'll post in VM.

PPE: We find it hard to find our TP of choice. Earlier this year we couldn't find my Quilted Northern and broke down to buy the single ply stuff you can see through. Try it sometime. It's a jumbo roll that will last you 4 times 'cause you have to take off so much! And it MELTS!

 

[MrMeowgi]

The urge is there to get a little redneck from time to time. I just cain't help myself! lol

It happens. And then people are shocked. I always say sometimes you gotta act a little crazy to get your point across. No more politics ring a bell? Had to flip my shit but got the point that the whole mod team had across. I didn't want to come back and it look like I just showed my ass to get my way. Wasn't really the full intention of my retirement but definitely was hoping it would start a change.

Ha ha you can tell when a redneck is rilled up. The emotion and language is completely different. The first time you'll ever hear the letter H before the W in the word What. It just got real (HWAT).

Sent from a pile of wood chips

 

[nadalama]

Well I'll be dipped in shit. I finally got a parcel from my 9/6 order with Sourcemore and it had all of the items in it. I'll post in VM.

PPE: We find it hard to find our TP of choice. Earlier this year we couldn't find my Quilted Northern and broke down to buy the single ply stuff you can see through. Try it sometime. It's a jumbo roll that will last you 4 times 'cause you have to take off so much! And it MELTS!

My coworker told me about a website where we could order Quilted Northern, so I ordered a case of 64 rolls for my oldest daughter, who has a house full of kids. I think that was in April or early May. Hubbs and I suffered through one pack of that thin Scott mess and that was all I could stand.

Have to compliment you on your exclamatory phrase there. I haven't heard that one before and it seriously made me LOL. I won't forget that one.

 

[SteveS45]

TP is no longer a problem here and I had bought a 20 pack of Foodtown stuff for the parents because it was next to the line to checkout. $14.99 for 20 rolls and this stuff is awesome~!

 

[gsmit1]

What does one use to polish brass mech tubes?

There's a difference between cleaning and polishing in my view. Cleaning will get the tarnish/oxidation off the current carrying contact surfaces for good performance, but won't make it gleam. If you want that high sheen aesthetic look on the external parts you need a cloth buffing wheel. Either on a drill motor or a bench grinder.

There's other stuff, but I bought a tub of THIS a long time ago and still have half of it. Cleans up brass and copper like nobody's business. The thick fluffy white micro fiber cloths from Dollar Tree are tailor made for cleaning mechs.

 

[nadalama]

There's a difference between cleaning and polishing in my view. Cleaning will get the tarnish/oxidation off the current carrying contact surfaces for good performance, but won't make it gleam. If you want that high sheen aesthetic look on the external parts you need a cloth buffing wheel. Either on a drill motor or a bench grinder.

There's other stuff, but I bought a tub of THIS a long time ago and still have half of it. Cleans up brass and copper like nobody's business. The thick fluffy white micro fiber cloths from Dollar Tree are tailor made for cleaning mechs.

I should have said clean rather than polish - I'm not worried about a mirror finish, I just don't want the tube to look dirty, which is how it's starting to look. If I can ever find my brass C2MNT, I'm going to put that on the Brizo, and it's a brushed finish anyway.

I'll definitely order some of that cream if they carry it at my Walmart. We order from there all the time. Thanks!

 

[gsmit1]

I should have said clean rather than polish - I'm not worried about a mirror finish, I just don't want the tube to look dirty, which is how it's starting to look. If I can ever find my brass C2MNT, I'm going to put that on the Brizo, and it's a brushed finish anyway.

I'll definitely order some of that cream if they carry it at my Walmart. We order from there all the time. Thanks!

It's a kind of cottonish wadding soaked with the cleaning solvent. You tear a piece off and wipe the pieces down with it and use a clean microfiber cloth to rub the patina off. I usually let it sit for a few minutes. Repeat until no more comes off on the cloth.

I definitely clean all the contact surfaces. Threads, including the 510 threads in the cap and depending on the mod, whatever other parts carry current.

 

[cmccarthy7128]

I recently ordered from them and I didnt get everything that I was charged for and they refuse to do anything about it. They told me to file a claim with the USPS

Sent from my Lenovo TB-X606F using Tapatalk

 

[SUKMYVAPOR]

Well I'll be dipped in shit. I finally got a parcel from my 9/6 order with Sourcemore and it had all of the items in it. I'll post in VM.

PPE: We find it hard to find our TP of choice. Earlier this year we couldn't find my Quilted Northern and broke down to buy the single ply stuff you can see through. Try it sometime. It's a jumbo roll that will last you 4 times 'cause you have to take off so much! And it MELTS!

I find using that if your finger pokes through just roll with it roflmao just keep your finger away from your nose.... JMO won't use as much that way .wash and repeat sorry feeling a little disturbed at the moment

 

[Ms. Trixy]

I recently ordered from them and I didnt get everything that I was charged for and they refuse to do anything about it. They told me to file a claim with the USPS

Sent from my Lenovo TB-X606F using Tapatalk

Sorry. I can't recall which vendor you're referring to. We got on a roll with the toilet paper.

If it's a China vendor, take a pic of the mailing label. The weight of the package is on it. They use that to determine how many items were in there based on weight. It worked for me at least 3 times. I suggest writing them back demanding your items again. And send them a copy of the label.

 

[gsmit1]

Here's a new one:

 

[inganeer]

This is strange. Forgive me I'm a idiot with this so called smart phone. I got notice that something I ordered (exocet v2) which was 24 hour shipping at the time along with a bunch of other goodies just shipped today?? The order I placed is sitting somewhere between St Louis Mo and Melrose Park IL. I guess maybe they forgot to put it in the package. I don't know. Have to wait and see I guess.

Sent from my LGL722DL using Tapatalk

 

[DogMan]

.

 

["11"]

Just tried to buy a $50 gift certificate at FT using PP, and the PP window opens, but slams closed almost immediately without ever reaching login. Perhaps a browser issue. Though I tried 3, but all are based on Mozilla. (Don't do Chrome or Edge myself.) There IS a button below the PP button for paying with Debit or CC after all... but didn't try that cause ain't gonna use it. (If I had a prepaid on hand ... but don't.) Will wait and see if PP works tomorrow... or the next day... what I want is out of stock for another week anyway.

TO BUY GIFT CERT AT FAST TECH WITH PAYPAL...

Searched the FT member forum and found a query from 2018 with someone having same basic issue and the 3rd response was from a FT employee who included a hyperlink to an alternate GC link ... clicked on it (was already logged into my acct) and it indeed opened a page within my acct which allowed me to buy a gift cert successfully using PayPal. (However you won't get the 5% off advertised on the main page, but at this point I didn't care.)

The original forum post (again look at the 3rd reply down) is here:

https://www.fasttech.com/forums/order-support/t/2667050/gift-certificates/1

... and if you wanna skip the forum and go directly to the hyperlink in that post which is the GC form:

https://m.fasttech.com/Account/OrderGiftCertificates

(Note that if you are not logged in and click the above link you will be asked to login with Captcha. Upon login you'll be in the GC form.)

So was able to get a $50 GC, then order an AS V3 w/ Advanced Kit + USPO Express for $3-something = total $49.61. Leaving 39 cents on the table. Now if only the AS V3 was in stock, but will be shipping in a week or so. Good enough for the likes of me.

 

[SteveS45]

Ordered some Coils on Friday morning from Vapeology because of @nadalama 's recommendation and really fast shipping.

 

[Skyhawk26]

TO BUY GIFT CERT AT FAST TECH WITH PAYPAL...

Searched the FT member forum and found a query from 2018 with someone having same basic issue and the 3rd response was from a FT employee who included a hyperlink to an alternate GC link ... clicked on it (was already logged into my acct) and it indeed opened a page within my acct which allowed me to buy a gift cert successfully using PayPal. (However you won't get the 5% off advertised on the main page, but at this point I didn't care.)

The original forum post (again look at the 3rd reply down) is here:

https://www.fasttech.com/forums/order-support/t/2667050/gift-certificates/1

... and if you wanna skip the forum and go directly to the hyperlink in that post which is the GC form:

https://m.fasttech.com/Account/OrderGiftCertificates

(Note that if you are not logged in and click the above link you will be asked to login with Captcha. Upon login you'll be in the GC form.)

So was able to get a $50 GC, then order an AS V3 w/ Advanced Kit + USPO Express for $3-something = total $49.61. Leaving 39 cents on the table. Now if only the AS V3 was in stock, but will be shipping in a week or so. Good enough for the likes of me.

I just bought a GC using my PayPal account and it went through . The GC is on my account together with the 5% extra. Getting ready for the Halloween Sale starting 31st Oct.

 

["11"]

I just bought a GC using my PayPal account and it went through . The GC is on my account together with the 5% extra. Getting ready for the Halloween Sale starting 31st Oct.

Which link did you use? The landing page link, or the one I posted?

As a side note, I emailed FT to tell them about the issue, asking them to fix the code on the landing page so ppl could get gift certs with whatever discounts are currently running, using PP. They wrote back that the link I used (and posted here) was old (which I knew, but it worked) and that's why it didn't have the 5% - then she wrote the next day that they 'fixed the code' and to try it again. I didn't need another GC so I didn't try it. But am curious if your GC was from the landing page or the other link.

 

[Ms. Trixy]

I found a China vendor called LegendGadget. Has anyone dealt with this vendor?
They take PP but if I need to dispute the charge I'm worried I may have a problem.

 

[nadalama]

I found a China vendor called LegendGadget. Has anyone dealt with this vendor?
They take PP but if I need to dispute the charge I'm worried I may have a problem.

LegendGadget is also related to VaporBreak.com. I used to order Hangsen e-liquids from them before I started mixing my own. Out of probably fifteen orders, I had problems with two. One just never arrived and one, that was supposed to go to my sister, was addressed wrong and was never received. When I tried to contact them about it, no one responded at all either time. After the second time, I quit ordering from them.

 

[Ms. Trixy]

LegendGadget is also related to VaporBreak.com. I used to order Hangsen e-liquids from them before I started mixing my own. Out of probably fifteen orders, I had problems with two. One just never arrived and one, that was supposed to go to my sister, was addressed wrong and was never received. When I tried to contact them about it, no one responded at all either time. After the second time, I quit ordering from them.

Thanks for your help. Too bad. I could have gotten some replacement coils cheap. And I would have ordered some Hangsen RY4 I've been missing for a few years. Damn. Did you receive your other 13 orders in fair time?

 

[MyMagicMist]

One of the things an auto-replenishment system should do is track the sales of items, and if those items sell out week after week, or day after day, the demand should be increased. It is obvious to anyone who knows their ass from a hole in the ground that the company is losing sales.

It is technically called a "rolling" inventory. Used to do it for a few the dinning places I worked at. Say for example I get inventory loads every two weeks. I use five cases of french fries a day normally, but it happens to be Summer. I might use eight cases a day. So, I need to estimate that I'll order thirty cases each order to keep consistent stock on hand.

Pure math wise this works out to 24.5 cases. I would go on and add an extra five though. Stores often swap between themselves and if one store has a surplus it's usually not an issue, as long as it's reasonable. Yep, that's another tolerance to consider.

Yes, that can be done via an algorithm, yet it is also something requiring a bit of human gauging too. For one thing you need to factor seasonal, promos, in house specials and your normal routine. Computers do accuracy not estimates. Now, I'm not saying AI could not learn to do it. It just seems a bit out of reach for it to me.

Sometimes even humans foul it up. One of the GMs at one place cost the head manager $200. She refused to order the amount I told her to order. I knew that we'd need X amount but she chose way less. I had to cover by ordering from "outside". That ran me $200, I turned it in to the head manager. The GM got docked half a month's pay, so it got made up.

Have done it in other forms of retail, business as well. Learning to do rolling inventory is a vital skill one can "pick up". You get some perks from it at times. I once got a place some extra product not listed for our market. That got me a bonus because the boss undercut sales on a competitor for a week.

 

[gsmit1]

I bought a Billet Box from Legend and had no problems, but that the only time.

 

[nadalama]

Thanks for your help. Too bad. I could have gotten some replacement coils cheap. And I would have ordered some Hangsen RY4 I've been missing for a few years. Damn. Did you receive your other 13 orders in fair time?

It usually took four to five weeks to get an order, so about like the other Chinese vendors we order from.

 

[Ruppy_bear]

Let me ask friend and see what I can do for you guys, I'm not 100% sure if this is going help you guys but let me see what I can do for you guys.

 

[gsmit1]

Ok, try THIS ONE now.

The only problem with that is that the package got here an hour ago.

 

[Ms. Trixy]

Ok, try THIS ONE now.

The only problem with that is that the package got here an hour ago.

Well now THAT'S a doosie! ?

 

[gsmit1]

Here's a bigger doosie.

See HERE

and then the same tracking number HERE.

4204824092748902493388587688

I never got it. That tracking number shows up nowhere except 17track. Not USPS, not 4PX, not FedEx, not UPS and not DHL. Nowhere and I never saw it.

 

[gsmit1]

This is the fishiest thing I've ever seen in 20 years of ordering various things online.

17 track is not a carrier and only tracks the shipments of actual carriers. 17track shows the package as delivered and 4PX as the origin country carrier, but reports no destination country carrier.

NONE of the possible destination carriers in the United States knows anything about this package ever even existing. Again, USPS, DHL, UPS or FedEx has NO record of ever even having heard of this tracking number.

17track shows it delivered in my city 2020-11-20 at 12:25 and it never got here.

 

[gsmit1]

Ok boys n girls. I officially give all the way up trying to understand what, pray tell, is going on with the parcel delivery outfits these days.

The package I was talking about in the last 2 posts above? The one that 17track shows as delivered 3 days ago even though I never saw it and neither did any other shipping carrier on this continent? It just showed up a few minutes ago. So it scanned as delivered 3 days ago even though it wasn't, but now 3 days later, here it is.

And that's not all!!!

My package from EVC that I posted HERE ???? Well guess what? That one was never delivered! I just got a paper notice telling me it was never delivered and why, which corresponds to THIS. This despite the fact that it was in my hand last Tuesday

All of this right on the heels of my DNA 60 screens from Evolv that were undeliverables because of the dog that nobody has, even though they were delivered the same day that the tracker reported that an imaginary dog made the package undeliverable.

There's no way I could make this stuff up. If you paid me.