LISTENING
At the beginning of my journey, I heard someone call cancer a "check engine light", and I didn't exactly understand what that meant. I was thinking about cancer as something that was happening
to my body, some outside, invading force that I had to fight for my life. Some people benefit from this mentality, and that it 100% okay; it gives them motivation and fire and the energy to keep going when they take on that battle frame of mind, and this was definitely me right after I was diagnosed.
So, this is why it was confusing to me to hear cancer being described as a check engine light. Just as a check engine light comes on to tell us when something is going wrong under the hood of our car, cancer can be viewed as a signal that "comes on" to let us know that there is something wrong going on under our own hood.
The conventional world treats the symptoms of cancer. It cuts out the tumour, it poisons any circulating tumour cells, and it burns any left where the tumour was. It does nothing, however, to try to identify or address the root causes, what led to cancer growing in our bodies in the first place, besides testing for genetics where applicable. When I asked my oncologist why I had developed cancer at such a young age with no genetic predisposition and very few of the traditional risk factors for breast cancer like smoking or being overweight, the only answer she was able to give was that there was no way to know for sure, so I shouldn't worry about it.
I was not satisfied with this answer, because I wanted to do everything I could to keep this from coming back, and that had to include addressing the root causes of it, the reasons for why the check engine light came on, or I was afraid it was just going to come on again. And so, I revisited the check engine light perspective and I started looking at cancer instead as a last desperate attempt by my body to get my attention and get my help. And I realized there had been other cries for help over the last few years that I had not listened to and dismissed too easily.
We have this mentality in today's society that we have to keep going, keep working, keep moving, even when our bodies protest. I can sleep when I'm dead, it's normal to work six days a week and 12 hours a day, I'm invincible, chronic stress is a normal part of life, I'm supposed to dislike going to work; these are all things we tell ourselves that allow us to stay in a miserable state and allow us to not listen to the more-ignorable warning signs that there are some things that need fixing or improving.
I was definitely NOT listening to my body in the years leading up to my diagnosis, and it was definitely trying to tell me not that I had cancer already, but that there were things affecting my health that needed addressing, like how much sugar I was eating, how much stress I was experiencing, and that my hormones were out of balance. It is of course
no one's fault when they get cancer, and I am definitely not patient or victim blaming, but if we are going to reach and maintain our optimal health and an internal environment that makes it harder for cancer to grow, we have to take responsibility for addressing the potential root causes that could have been at play for us; we
have to start listening to our bodies.
So, tune in and see what your body is trying to tell you. Connect to it, build a relationship with it, and take care of it. My mom used to tell us when we were growing up, "Take care of your body, because you only have the one!", and I definitely laughed it off as just a cute saying. Today, I understand that it couldn't be more true. We deserve our own attention and care, and that starts with listening.
Happy Healing
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